A Helping Friend!

I was expecting my Oriental 
friend Chu to arrive at the
airport and wanted to be 
picked up at the same time 
that I had a pressing commitment 
elsewhere. I simply couldn't
be in two places at once, 
but I couldn't get out of 
my previous commitment. 

What to do? 

Then I remembered that

my friend Stuart had 
offered several times 
to help me if he ever 
could in any way. 

Maybe he could solve 

my problem.

So I called him up, explained 

my dilemma to him, and asked
him, "Please, Stu, meet Chu."


Professor Howdy said...

-On average women say 7,000 words per day. Men manage just
over 2000.

-On average, 150 couples get married in Las Vegas each day.

-During pregnancy, the average woman's uterus expands up to
five hundred times its normal size.

-Cats average 16 hours of sleep a day, more than any other

-In 1900 the average age at death in the US was 47.

-An average beaver can cut down two hundred trees a year.

-An average pig squeals at a range from 100 to 115 decibels.

-An ear of corn averages 800 kernels in 16 rows.

Professor Howdy said...

Two men, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day,
were led down to the room in which they would meet their maker.
The priest had given them last rites, the formal speech had been
given by the warden, and a final prayer had been said among the

The warden, turning to the first man, solemnly asked, "Son, do you
have a last request?"

To which the man replied, "Yes sir, I do. I love country music. Could
you please play some country music for me one last time?"

"Certainly," replied the warden. He turned to the other man and asked,
"Well, what about you, son? What is your final request?"

"Please," said the condemned man, "kill me first."

Professor Howdy said...

A housewife with three young children was getting dinner
ready when the phone rang. The six-year-old picked it up
and said, "Hi, Daddy!" and she began telling him about her
day. She then passed the phone to her brother and sister
as was the custom whenever Daddy called from work.

When it was finally the wife's turn to talk she took the receiver
and said, "Hi, hon."

"Thank goodness, lady," the voice on the other end replied.
"I just called to tell you that the wallpaper you ordered is here!"

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the great giggles:-)

Professor Howdy said...

My pleasure...

Adrian Monk said...

"Obama held his first news conference today, as president-
elect. White House reporters were confused because he didn't
make up any words, and almost everything he said made sense."
-Jimmy Kimmel

Professor Howdy said...

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