A Traveling UNC Grad!

A UNC grad traveling through 
the prairies of Colorado stopped 
at a small town and went to a cafe. 
He stood at the end of the bar, 
ordered a coke, and lit up a cigar.

As he sipped his coke, he stood 

there quietly blowing smoke rings. 

After he blew nine or ten

smoke rings into the air, 
an angry American Indian 
stomped up to him and said, 
"One more remark like that 
and I'll bust you in the chops!"


Professor Howdy said...

Study: Violence, Sex Increases in Movies

BOSTON (AP) - Violence, sex, and profanity in movies increased significantly
between 1992 and 2003, while ratings became more lenient, according to a new
Harvard study.

Research by the Kids Risk Project at the Harvard School of Public Health
found a "ratings creep" for movies, and suggested that the Motion Picture
Association of America was relaxing standards in rating films.

The study, released Tuesday, suggested that films rated PG and PG-13 had
become more violent; that there was more sexual content in PG, PG-13, and R
films; and more profanity was used in films rated PG-13 and R.

The researchers said the current rating system does not adequately describe
the contents of movies.

Professor Howdy said...


When the moon hits your eye Like a big pizza pie That's amore.

When an eel bites your hand And that's not what you planned
That's a moray.

When our habits are strange And our customs deranged That's
our mores.

When your horse munches straw And the bales total four That's
some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife She gets stabbed with a knife That's
a Moor, eh?

Professor Howdy said...

A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly,
"I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied,
"What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?"
The son replied, "I do know!"

"Okay," said his father. "So, son, what does the Bible mean?"

"That's easy, Daddy. It stands for 'Basic Instructions Before
Leaving Earth.'"

Professor Howdy said...

*January 9, 1969
The first trial test of the Franco-British supersonic commercial
aircraft "Concorde" took place at Bristol, England. The Concorde
crosses the Atlantic from Paris or London at the speed of Mach 2
(1,336 mph or 2,150 kph) and a hefty round-ticket price of more than
US $8,000.

Professor Howdy said...

Diet Rules for Cheaters

1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy
bar are cancelled out by the diet soda.

3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat
more than they do.

4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate,
brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.

5. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.

6. Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red
Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they
are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.

7. Cookie pieces contain no fat--the process of breaking causes fat leakage.

8. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the
process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife
making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.

9. Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories.
Examples are: spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate.

10. Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of
heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies, and Popsicles.

NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.

Professor Howdy said...

How different is the
cranial-vault thickness
of Homo erectus from
modern man???


Click Here

Professor Howdy said...

Songs From the Hospital Hit Parade:

"I'll be Sewing You"
"Red Cells in the Sunset"
"It's Spleen a Long, Long Time"
"It Had to Be Flu"
"On the Bonny Banks of Glaucoma"
"Gonna Take a Sentimental Gurney"
"Yes, We Have No Pajamas"
"Glove Me Tender
"The Staphs and Streps Forever"
"The Pill Is Gone"
"Old Man's Liver"
"Try To Dismember"
"That Old Gangrene of Mine"
"I've Grown Accustomed to Her Brace"
"On the Road to Mend and Lay"
"The Girl From Emphysema"
"Lay That Hupo Down, Babe"
"Secondhand Nose"
"You're Nobody Until Somebody Gloves You:
"Call Me Unresponsive"
"MRI Blue?"
"Some Implanted Evening"
"Blame It on My Tooth"
"My Melancolicky Baby"
"From Here to Maternity"
"Merci, Docs"
"You Broke Your Promise But I'll Get a Lung"

Professor Howdy said...

Reaching The World -
Our Readers' Locations:

Num Perc. Country Name
drill down 135 27.00% United States United States
drill down 64 12.80% Taiwan Taiwan
drill down 51 10.20% India India
drill down 21 4.20% Australia Australia
drill down 19 3.80% United Kingdom United Kingdom
drill down 16 3.20% Pakistan Pakistan
drill down 15 3.00% Italy Italy
drill down 14 2.80% Malaysia Malaysia
drill down 14 2.80% Saudi Arabia Saudi Arabia
drill down 13 2.60% Reunion Reunion
drill down 12 2.40% United Arab Emirates United Arab Emirates
drill down 9 1.80% Germany Germany
drill down 7 1.40% Sri Lanka Sri Lanka
drill down 7 1.40% Canada Canada
drill down 6 1.20% Hungary Hungary
drill down 6 1.20% Syrian Arab Republic Syrian Arab Republic
drill down 5 1.00% South Africa South Africa
drill down 5 1.00% France France
drill down 5 1.00% Ukraine Ukraine
drill down 5 1.00% Ira Ira
drill down 4 0.80% Kenya Kenya
drill down 4 0.80% Philippines Philippines
drill down 4 0.80% Latvia Latvia
drill down 4 0.80% Nigeria Nigeria
drill down 4 0.80% Kore Kore
drill down 4 0.80% China China
drill down 3 0.60% Tunisia Tunisia
drill down 3 0.60% Bahrain Bahrain
drill down 3 0.60% Kuwait Kuwait
drill down 3 0.60% Slovenia Slovenia
drill down 3 0.60% Indonesia Indonesia
drill down 3 0.60% Costa Rica Costa Rica
drill down 2 0.40% Czech Republic Czech Republic
drill down 2 0.40% Romania Romania
drill down 2 0.40% Ghana Ghana
drill down 2 0.40% Switzerland Switzerland
drill down 2 0.40% Spain Spain
drill down 2 0.40% Malta Malta
drill down 2 0.40% Thailand Thailand
drill down 2 0.40% Oman Oman
drill down 2 0.40% Argentina Argentina
drill down 2 0.40% Puerto Rico Puerto Rico
drill down 2 0.40% Israel Israel
drill down 2 0.40% Denmark Denmark
drill down 2 0.40% Turkey Turkey
drill down 1 0.20% Jordan Jordan
drill down 1 0.20% El Salvador El Salvador
drill down 1 0.20% Poland Poland

Above numbers give a snapshot of the locations
of our last 500 readers around 7 A.M. today.
This will change completely in the next few
minutes. 'Thought & Humor' has been read in
ALL 230 countries of the world.-"But indeed
for this purpose I have raised you up, that
I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth."

But how can people call for help if they
don't know who to trust? And how can
they know who to trust if they haven't
heard of the One who can be trusted?
And how can they hear if nobody tells
them? - RO X:XIV

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Wist u dat de God van u houdt?
Avez-vous su que Dieu vous aime ?
Wußten Sie, daß Gott Sie liebt?
Avete saputo che il dio li ama?
Você soube que o deus o ama?
¿Usted sabía que el dios le ama?

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