Thought For The OPEN Mind - Humor From American Culture!
First Published In The Last Century - July 26, 1997!
Over 9 Million Hits!
An Amusement Park Of Ideas! #ProfHowdy
Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?He wanted to make up for a bad summer.
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog it's too dark to read." -Groucho Marx
Things You May Hear Just Before Unemployment (Howdy hears them often)*I don't know what we'll do without you, but we are going to try!*We told everyone you are leaving because of illness. The truth isI'm sick of you.*Its not that you aren't a responsible worker. In fact, you've beenresponsible for more disasters than any one else in the place.*Today I'm going to mix business with pleasure. You're fired!*I've got good news for you. You won't have to worry about beinglate for work ever again.*Tell me - how long have you been with us not counting tomorrow?
The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. ( They are reused in vein transplant surgery)Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana.(They were seventh cousins)If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.If all the veins in your body were laid end-to-end, you'd be dead.
Another Income Tax day has come and gone, and amid the sighs of relief, there has come across the Internet this thought on the subject: “A fine is a tax for doing wrong; A tax is a fine for doing well.” And as Gary Bauer points out, the Federal Tax Code is 7 times longer than the BIble, and the top 10% of Americans, those who make over $100,000 per year, pay 70% of Federal income taxes.To Subscribe (no subscription fee):EPOCHCommentaryemail@example.com
The Democrat leader’s new view of Easter: in a recent press release, Democrat National Committee Chairman Howard Dean continued his crusade to revise Christianity to fit his self constructed mold, describing Easter as “a holiday that represents peace, redemption and renewal, a theme which brings hope to people of all faiths.” Chairman Dean makes no reference to Jesus’ resurrection from the dead. The American Family Association called on Dean and the Democrat National Committee to apologize for “taking Easter and making it into a nondescript, universal. nonexclusive religious celebration for all religions.” Rob Schenck of the National Clergy Council said the statement “does betray that, at its heart, the Democrat leadership is in fact secularist by philosophy and worldview.” But Howard Dean had made all that clear long ago.To Subscribe (no subscription fee):EPOCHCommentaryfirstname.lastname@example.org
Speaking of Virtues, National and Personal,What about the Need for Humility? “Humility” is very much more a Scriptural term than the concept we discussed last week: “Civility.” The study of Scriptural concepts and doctrines is titled “Theology,” as we are well aware. There are several acceptable definitions of Theology; perhaps as useful as any is this brief one: “The reasoned discourse concerning religion, spirituality and God.” In the middle ages it was called “The Queen of the Sciences.” Today, buffeted by prevailing bigotry, arrogance and ignorance in an era when relativism has interfered with man’s pursuit of knowledge and wisdom, Theology is being relegated to a position well below the one it enjoyed in the middle ages by popular exponents of the “feel good” approach to religious experience. In the study of Theology in some of the more formalized Christian religious denominations, such as Catholic, Lutheran and Anglican, as distinct from more informal denominations such as Baptist, Methodist and Pentecostal, human attributes such as Civility and Humility, are classified as Virtues. The classifications begin with those designated “Theological Virtues, considered as supernatural: Faith, Hope and Love; next are the “Capital Virtues” considered as opposing the “Seven Deadly Sins:” Humility, Liberality, Brotherly Love, Meekness, Chastity, Temperance and Diligence. Finally there are the “Cardinal Virtues,” considered as being natural: Prudence, Justice, Temperance and Fortitude. It is immediately obvious that Humility is right up there near the top as a very important virtue. Throughout the Bible, Humility is one of the most frequently mentioned characterizations of the Christian life, and yet is one of the most misunderstood of the changes which occur in the life of a Christian under the workings of the Holy Spirit. To begin with, to be humble is not to be weak. Humility does not involve groveling or self abasement. Humility has no association with humiliation. To be humble does not mean to think less of yourself. It is probably true that in today’s society we really don’t understand humility at all. Our society does very little to foster humility or humble behavior. In some instances hierarchy or class dominates the way of life. In other instances wealth or power is the controlling factor. In others success is based on merits, whether or not earned or deserved. In all such situations the participants are living an illusion. They need to heed the words of Paul, “not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly …” (Romans 12:3) It has been said that to understand how to get along with God, read the Psalms, but to understand how to get along with fellow men, read the Proverbs. On this subject, there are many passages in Proverbs which speak to the importance of humility and a humble approach to life. Key to this concept is the following, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2 NIV) In the New Testament all the teachings of the Old Testament remain as foundational, and the prime example of the ideal life of humility, the true personification of a humble man is seen in the person of Jesus Christ. As Paul writes in Philippians 2:5 – 9, “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus, who being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God; but made Himself of no reputation, and took upon Him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men; and being found in fashion as a man, He humbled Himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross; whereby God hath highly exalted Him, and given Him a name which is above every name …” There is no more complete demonstration of humility, or of the humble life than this. Instructions for the Christian in this regard are found throughout the New Testament . . . “Be clothed with humility …Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God … God giveth grace unto the humble …Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord … Put on, as the elect of God, humbleness of mind … In lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves …” (I Peter 5: 5, 6; James 4:6, 10; Col. 3:12; Phil. 2:3) In its outworking in our Christian lives, humility is the lack of self importance. It is being open minded, with a willingness, even a desire, to learn from others. Humility involves a searching for more success and more abundance, but governs the demeanor and attitude we demonstrate as we seek to attain those goals. Humility in action joins with Civility – it is exemplified by courtesy. But those thoughts all relate to Humility on an individual basis. What about the national aspects of humility? That there is a national aspect of humility was expressed by Mark Warner, ex-Governor of Virginia, when he was still a presidential candidate: “What we need in our foreign policy is bit more humility.” It is interesting that one of the many Old Testament references to Humility can be considered an instruction from God which transcends an individual application and becomes national in scope. II Chronicles 7:14, puts the instruction very clearly: “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will hear their land.” This clear instruction was directed to “my people.” God’s first requirement is to show humility: “humble themselves.” There are other requirements – to pray, and seek God’s face, and turn from wicked ways – but God does not do things happenstance. If He put humility first, it is because that is His first requirement. His promise in turn is a bold, sweeping one – “I will hear from heaven . . . I will forgive their sin . . . I will heal their land.” Surely it can be agreed that we here in America need to live in the blessing of forgiven sins and our nation healed. Mark Warner may have expressed the need very succinctly: we need to demonstrate a bit more humility. How to achieve a national act of humility? A difficult concept at best. We are familiar with an old rule of physics that the whole is equal to the sum of its parts. So also a nation is equal to the sum of individuals who constitute it. Thus individuals humbling themselves could accomplish a national act of humility. But wonderful as is God’s promise of blessing, note should be made of an alternative result if His requirements are not met. Just a few words down the page, at verse 19 God promises that if the nation should turn away from Him, and forsake His commandments, then His wrath would come upon them, and the reason given is in verse 22: “Because they forsook the Lord God of their fathers … and laid hold on other gods and worshipped them.” This is the word of God, who does not, who cannot, lie – as Jesus said, “Thy word is truth.” (John 17:17) So the choice is clear – God’s blessing or God’s wrath. Humility, being humble, is more than a temporal relationship with one’s fellow men, and is part of the relationship which God demands of His people, both as individuals and nations. Meeting His requirements brings blessing. Disobeying His requirements brings disaster. Even one individual can start the process; joined by others there can be a sweeping national compliance with God’s demands. Dare we mention the word “revival” or “national spiritual awakening?” There have been revivals or awakenings at significant periods in history, and it can be said that the situation is developing in America where from a Christian viewpoint a national revival is imperative. As the late Stephen Olford said shortly before his death in 2004, “It is my conviction that we are never going to have a revival until God has brought the church of Jesus Christ to the point of desperation.” Aren’t we just about there now? The foundation for a national revival rests with the individual who will pray the message of the familiar song, “Lord send a revival, and let it begin in me.” Quote of the Week: “You cannot revive something that has never had life, so revival, by definition, it is first of all an enlivening and quickening and awakening of lethargic, sleeping church members. Suddenly the power of the Spirit comes upon them … they are humbled, they are convicted of sin … they begin to pray. New power comes into the preaching of the ministers, and the result of this is large numbers are converted.” -- D. Martyn Lloyd Jones, Westminster Chapel, London Afterthoughts . . .What more can be said about the Virginia Tech tragedy? For those of us outside the immediate college family the only way we can help is through our prayers for God’s peace to take over the hearts of those directly affected through loss of family members or friends. And this is no small part to play. The request for prayer supporters is not a casual one. It is meaningful. The Bible is replete with admonitions to pray, and promises of results from those prayers. The suggestion of a need for a national revival, a spiritual awakening, across our country may be particularly timely, Our God has promised to heal our land if His requirements are met. These are serious matters in difficult times. To Subscribe (no subscription fee):EPOCHCommentaryemail@example.com
Thanks for your blog! I wrote about you today on my blog! Thanks for keeping me laughing!
Jennifer sent me here to visit you a couple of weeks ago. Your type of blog is very needed! Keep it up for us! God bless!
because he was an egg :-) and talk too much alone :-))))
thank you . your blog is beautiful. can i talk to him - is it alright w/ him?
Yes of course...
could you ask him to talk to me?
Master photographer Edward Steichen once remarked that the mission ofphotography is to explain man to man and each to himself--a mission hefound at once both complicated and naïve, but worth fumbling toward. "Every other artist begins with a blank canvas, a piece of paper," notesSteichen. "The photographer begins with the finished product." It is athought befitting of a scene from 2001, when the who's who of thecountry's finest photographers volunteered their time for such a mission. What they discovered is that when the "finished products" are the faces ofchildren in foster care systems across the country, photography offers thechance of new life. Diane Granito is the founder of the Heart Gallery, a unique program thatuses photography to help find homes for older foster children, siblinggroups, and other children who are traditionally difficult to place withfamilies.(1) The program started in New Mexico in 2001 at the suggestionof a local photographer. Space was then donated by a prominent gallery inthe city, where more than 1,000 people came opening night. The photos onexhibit were the end result of the photographers' attempts to coax out theunique personalities in hundreds of children--a great contrast to thetypical photos attached to a child's file. "They look like mug shots,"said one of the photographers. "This is an opportunity to just portraythem as kids in their environments," said another involved. "We'retreating this as a living, breathing project." Since its inception, the Santa Fe project has inspired 60 more HeartGalleries in 45 states. In some places, the adoption rate after anexhibit is more than double the nationwide rate of adoption from fostercare. Such photography earns a description worthy of its roots: the wordin Greek means "to write in light."Those who work to find foster children adoptive families are used torubbing up against the public perception that most foster children haveserious emotional and behavioral problems. Sometimes, though not always,it is an accurate perception. And a picture offered in a different lightdoes not change the child it portrays. But an image of a troubled childat play offers the accurate light of hope. We all have many faces that could be portrayed to the world. If thepictures that represented us to the world were pictures that showed ourworst sides, I wonder how different the circles of people around us wouldbe. There are definitely certain faces I would prefer not to havecaptured in a photograph and placed in my file. While those close to mehave by now seen me in many kinds of light, it is frightening to imaginemy adoption being contingent on any one of them. Yet, our adoption asGod's own was completed as we stood in the worst of all possible lights. "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were stillsinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). As Christ died for the sins ofthe world, he held dear even the pictures of us at our worst. While in prison, Dietrich Bonhoeffer struggled with the many reflectionsof his life. As a seminary instructor he was considered a saint and agiant. In America they made him feel like an escapist. In prison theymade him feel like a criminal. There were days when he saw himself as allthree and all the stages in between. It was in such a convolution ofimages that he asked: "Who am I? This or the other? Am I one person today, and tomorrow another? Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,And before myself a contemptible woebegone weakling? Or is something within me still like a beaten army, Fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved? Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine. Whoever I am, Thou knowest, O God, I am Thine."(2)Our adoption by God is our identity, the picture we hold as children untilthe day when there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, andGod will wipe every tear from our eyes. Neither death nor life, noranything else in all creation, can separate us from this love of God thatis in Christ Jesus our Lord. Jill Carattini is managing editor of A Slice of Infinity at RaviZacharias International Ministries in Atlanta, Georgia.(1) http://www.heartgalleryofamerica.org/About_Heart_Gallery/History.asp (2) Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison (New York:Touchstone), 348. ----------------------------------- Ravi Zacharias International Ministries (RZIM)"A Slice of Infinity" is aimed at reaching into the culture with words ofchallenge, words of truth, and words of hope. If you know of others whowould enjoy receiving "A Slice of Infinity" in their email box each day,tell them they can sign up on our website athttp://www.rzim.org/slice/slice.php. If they do not have access to theWorld Wide Web, please call 1-877-88SLICE (1-877-887-5423).
Just wanted to stop by and say thanks for checking out my blog a little while ago. -Sam
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