Thursday

This Wife Has A Problem!




Over dinner, my UNC wife said to me, "I met this horrible and rude man downtown this morning, and right away I knew he was a troublemaker.

He started to insult me; he used really bad language; he even threatened me!"

"How did you meet this fellow?" I asked, very concerned. She said, "Well, we met by accident, I hit him with the car."





10 comments:

Professor Howdy said...

On August 16, 1960, a US Air Force balloonist named Joseph Kittinger
ascended in an open-gondola balloon to a record-setting altitude of
102,800 feet (31,300 meters). Wearing a pressure suit and a
parachute, he stepped out of the balloon into very thin air.

Kittinger free-fell for four minutes and 37 seconds. With
almost no air resistance at that altitude, his vertical speed reached
almost 1000 kilometers per hour (600 mph) -- about the same speed as
a jet airliner, only going straight down.

Eight minutes after his chute opened, he landed at White Sands
Missile Range in New Mexico, having set records for highest
open-gondola balloon flight, longest free-fall, fastest free-fall,
and longest parachute descent.

Professor Howdy said...

*Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but
only what is helpful for building others up according to their
needs, that it may benefit those who listen. --Ephesians 4

===============

To err is human, but it's against school policy.

===============

*Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in
humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you
should look not only to your own interests, but also to the
interest of others. --Philippians 2

===============

Silly Putty

More than 300 million eggs of Silly Putty have been sold since
1950. Each egg contains 13.3 grams of the stuff. Silly Putty
was invented in 1943 by General Electric researcher James
Wright as he tried to develop a synthetic rubber. He tried to
find a practical use for it, and sent pleas to engineers
around the world, with no luck. In 1950, a Connecticut toy
store got hold of a batch and started selling it in plastic
eggs, and the rest is history.

Apollo 8 astronauts used Silly Putty to keep their tools
from floating around while in Lunar orbit.

Athletes squeeze it to strengthen their grip.

Computer people use it to clean their keyboards.

According to Binny & Smith (the makers of the putty,)
sculptor George Horner sells pieces of art made out of Silly
Putty for up to $2,000.

People have been encouraged to play with Silly Putty
rather than smoke.

Silly Putty is on display at the Smithsonian Institution
as part of a history exhibit on pop culture.

Professor Howdy said...

A UNC professor is driving along the road when he sees a sign on a plot
of land that reads "40 acres for sale" and lists a phone number and in big bold
letters the words "WILL DIVIDE". The man has been considering buying a
bit of land for investment purposes. He calls the number and when a lady
picks up, he asks her, "Is Mr. Divide in?"

===============

You Know You're From California When:

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercing's and none are visible.

2. You make over $250,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You are shocked at 2 people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, is
named Breeze.

Professor Howdy said...




Reaching The World -
Our Readers' Locations:



Num Perc. State/Region Country Name
drill down 84 16.80% Sindh Pakistan Pakistan
drill down 43 8.60% Veneto Italy Italy
drill down 42 8.40% Toscana Italy Italy
drill down 38 7.60% Nordrhein-westfalen Germany Germany
drill down 35 7.00% Trentino-alto Adige Italy Italy
drill down 20 4.00% Georgia United States United States
drill down 17 3.40% T'ai-pei Taiwan Taiwan
drill down 14 2.80% California United States United States
drill down 13 2.60% Michigan United States United States
drill down 12 2.40% Tamil Nadu India India
drill down 12 2.40% L'vivs'ka Oblast' Ukraine Ukraine
drill down 10 2.00% Cebu City Philippines Philippines
drill down 9 1.80% Alger Algeria Algeria
drill down 9 1.80% Madhya Pradesh India India
drill down 8 1.60% Punjab Pakistan Pakistan
drill down 7 1.40% Nord-pas-de-calais France France
drill down 7 1.40% Karnataka India India
drill down 7 1.40% Ash Sharqiyah Saudi Arabia Saudi Arabia
drill down 6 1.20% London United Kingdom United Kingdom
drill down 6 1.20% Pennsylvania United States United States
drill down 6 1.20% North Carolina United States United States
drill down 6 1.20% Wyoming United States United States
drill down 5 1.00% Gujarat India India
drill down 5 1.00% South Carolina United States United States
drill down 4 0.80% Hertford United Kingdom United Kingdom
drill down 4 0.80% Unknown Unknown -
drill down 4 0.80% Extremadura Spain Spain
drill down 4 0.80% Rheinland-pfalz Germany Germany
drill down 4 0.80% Cumbria United Kingdom United Kingdom
drill down 4 0.80% New South Wales Australia Australia
drill down 4 0.80% Dimashq Syrian Arab Republic Syrian Arab Republic
drill down 4 0.80% Ar Riyad Saudi Arabia Saudi Arabia
drill down 3 0.60% Florida United States United States
drill down 3 0.60% Wielkopolskie Poland Poland
drill down 3 0.60% Al Qahirah Egypt Egypt
drill down 3 0.60% New York United States United States
drill down 3 0.60% Rajasthan India India
drill down 3 0.60% West Virginia United States United States
drill down 3 0.60% Indiana United States United States
drill down 2 0.40% Wisconsin United States United States
drill down 2 0.40% Krung Thep Thailand Thailand
drill down 2 0.40% South Dakota United States United States
drill down 2 0.40% Pomorskie Poland Poland
drill down 2 0.40% British Columbia Canada Canada
drill down 2 0.40% Tartumaa Estonia Estonia
drill down 2 0.40% Arizona United States United States
drill down 2 0.40% Mississippi United States United States
drill down 2 0.40% Skane Lan Sweden Sweden
drill down 2 0.40% Rizal Philippines Philippines
drill down 1 0.20% Iasi Romania Romania
drill down 1 0.20% Oregon United States United States
drill down 1 0.20% Texas United States United States
drill down 1 0.20% Massachusetts United States United States
drill down 1 0.20% Virginia United States United States
drill down 1 0.20% Tehran Iran, Islamic Republic Of Iran, Islamic Republic Of




Above numbers give a snapshot of the locations
of our last 500 readers around 7 A.M. today.
This will change completely in the next few
minutes. 'Thought & Humor' has been read in
ALL 230 countries of the world.-"But indeed
for this purpose I have raised you up, that
I may show My power in you, and that My
Name may be declared in all the earth."
EX IX:XVI

But how can people call for help if they
don't know who to trust? And how can
they know who to trust if they haven't
heard of the One who can be trusted?
And how can they hear if nobody tells
them? - RO X:XIV



Click Here
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Wist u dat de God van u houdt?
Avez-vous su que Dieu vous aime ?
Wußten Sie, daß Gott Sie liebt?
Avete saputo che il dio li ama?
Você soube que o deus o ama?
¿Usted sabía que el dios le ama?


http://everystudent.com/menus/intl.html

Click Here
Click Here

Professor Howdy said...

Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 3:13-14

Professor Howdy said...

For God so loved the world
that He gave His only Son!

Professor Howdy said...

Whatever you do, work at it with
all your heart... Colosians 3:23

Professor Howdy said...

Let us then approach the throne of grace
with confidence, so that we may receive mercy

and find grace to help us in our time of need.
- Hebrews 4:16

Professor Howdy said...

Neither height nor depth,
nor anything else in all creation,

will be able to separate us
from the love of God that

is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
- Romans 8:39

Professor Howdy said...

So do not fear, for I am with you; do
not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous
right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

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