A UNC grad stopped by a pizza
shop one night and ordered a
medium pizza.The Italian owner
asked "How would you like that
cut, in six or four pieces?"
After some thought, the UNC
student answered, "Better cut
it in four, I don't think I can
eat six pieces!"
*Above demonstrates what intelligent
beautiful girls do when you send them
'T & H' jokes if they esteem you!!! 100%
Veracious - Why wrastle with the hassle!!!
Scientifically Proven - Results Plighted!!!
Google: T3H7P12H
#ProfHowdy
Q: What do you call a UNC* skeleton
ReplyDeletein the closet?
A: Last year's hide and seek champ.
________
*UNC is the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill.
Specializing in a wide range of degree programs including:
B.A. A.H.F.(Advanced Hamburger Flipping), A.P.E., B.R.C.
(Bar Room Conversations), etc. Institution was founded in 1898
for sons/daughters of local Chapel Still politicians that were
unable to qualify for the more prestigious institutions of higher
learning such as Duke, Wake Forest, and N.C. State.
===============
While attending a convention in Chapel Hill, three psychiatrists
take a walk.
"People are always coming to us with their guilt and fears,"
one says, "but we have no one to go to with our own problems."
"Since we're all professionals," another suggests, "why don't
we hear each other out right now?"
They agreed this is a good idea. The first psychiatrist confesses,
"I'm a compulsive shopper and deeply in debt, so I usually overbill
my patients as often as I can."
The second admits, "I have a drug problem that's out of control,
and I frequently pressure my patients into buying illegal drugs for
me."
The third psychiatrist says, "I know it's wrong, but no matter
how hard I try, I just can't keep a secret."
Howdy, driving his Volkswagen Beetle, pulls up next to a guy in a Rolls Royce at a stop sign.
ReplyDeleteTheir windows are open and Howdy yells at the guy in the Rolls, "Hey, you got a telephone in that Rolls?"
The guy in the Rolls says, "Yes, of course I do.."
"I got one too... see?" Howdy says.
"Uh, huh, yes, that's very nice."
"You got a fax machine?" asks Howdy.
"Why, actually, yes, I do."
"I do too! See? It's right here!" brags Howdy.
The light is just about to turn green and Howdy says, "So, do you have a double bed in back there?"
The guy in the Rolls replies, "NO! Do you?"
"Yep, got my double bed right in back here," Howdy replies.
The light turns and Howdy takes off.
Well, the guy in the Rolls is not about to be one-upped, so he immediately goes to a customizing shop and orders them to put a double bed in back of his car.
About two weeks later, the job is finally done. He picks up his car and drives all over town looking for Howdy's car. Finally, he finds it parked alongside the road, so he pulls his Rolls up next to it.
The windows on Howdy's Volkswagen are all fogged up and he feels somewhat awkward about it, but he gets out of his newly modified Rolls and taps on the foggy window of the Volkswagen.
Howdy finally opens the window a crack and peeks out.
The guy with the Rolls says, "Hey, remember me?"
"Yeah, yeah, I remember you," replies Howdy, "What's up?"
"Check this out...I got a double bed installed in my Rolls."
Howdy exclaims, "YOU GOT ME OUT OF THE SHOWER TO TELL ME THAT?
Two men sank into adjacent train seats after a long
ReplyDeleteday in the city.
One asked the other, "Your son go back to college
yet?"
"Two days ago."
"Hmm. Mine's a senior this year, so it's almost over.
In May, he'll be an engineer."
"What's your boy going to be when he gets out of
college?"
"At the rate he's going, I'd say he'll be about
thirty."
"No, I mean what's he taking in college?"
"He's taking every penny I make."
"Doesn't he burn the midnight oil enough?"
"He doesn't get in early enough to burn the midnight
oil."
"Well, has sending him to college done anything at
all?"
"Sure has! It's totally cured his mother of bragging
about him!"
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If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land. - 2 Chronicles 7:14 NKJ
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