tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post8043075832386882741..comments2024-02-13T08:49:07.287-04:00Comments on 'Thought & Humor!': UNC Farm In Alaska!Professor Howdyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12189934292678757335noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-59928928521533975632008-06-16T09:15:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:15:00.000-03:00We had built our dream house several years ago, an...We had built our dream house several years ago, and <BR/>furnished it with quality pieces as we could afford them. <BR/>Now the delivery truck carrying the last purchase, a new <BR/>bedroom suite, was pulling into the driveway. <BR/><BR/>"Finally!" I exclaimed, flinging open the front door as the <BR/>driver walked up to the house. "I've been waiting twelve <BR/>years for this!" <BR/><BR/>"Don't blame me, lady," he said. "I just got the order this <BR/>morning."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-70736236164274632102008-06-16T09:14:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:14:00.000-03:00"In Chicago, a couple who are Cubs fans have named..."In Chicago, a couple who are Cubs fans have named their baby <BR/>Wrigley Field. Apparently the couple expects their baby to be <BR/>a lot of fun, but ultimately disappointing." -Conan O'BrienAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-91437561473362124802008-06-16T09:13:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:13:00.000-03:00"Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton had what they ca..."Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton had what they called a <BR/>secret meeting. One of the topics rumored to be discussed <BR/>is Hillary's $20 million campaign debt. Obama may help her <BR/>cover some of that. Today she outlined a plan for recouping <BR/>that money: She plans on marrying, then divorcing, Paul <BR/>McCartney." -Jimmy KimmelAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-41667425658490587132008-06-16T09:06:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:06:00.000-03:00My wife and I were sitting in the living room and ...My wife and I were sitting in the living room and I said to <BR/>her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative <BR/>state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. <BR/>If that ever happens, just pull the plug." <BR/><BR/>She got up, unplugged the TV and poured out all of my beer!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-58528877488360460562008-06-16T09:05:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:05:00.000-03:00Traveling down the interstate and needing to use t...Traveling down the interstate and needing to use the bath- <BR/>room, I stopped at a rest area and headed to the restrooms. <BR/><BR/>I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the <BR/>ther stall saying: 'Hi, how are you?' <BR/><BR/>I'm not the type to start a conversation in the restroom and <BR/>I don't know what got into me, but I answered, somewhat <BR/>embarrassed, 'Doin' just fine.' <BR/><BR/>And the other person says: 'So what are you up to?' <BR/><BR/>What kind of question is that? At that point, I'm thinking <BR/>this is too bizarre so I say: 'Uhhh, I'm like you, just <BR/>traveling.' <BR/><BR/>At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can <BR/>when I hear another question. 'Can I come over?' <BR/><BR/>Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I <BR/>could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell them <BR/>'No..I'm a little busy right now!' <BR/><BR/>Then I hear the person say nervously... 'Listen, I'll have <BR/>to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who <BR/>keeps answering all my questions.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-55442444702200059442008-06-16T09:00:00.000-03:002008-06-16T09:00:00.000-03:00In the early 20th century a world market for only ...In the early 20th century a world market for only 4 million <BR/>automobiles was made because "the world would run out of <BR/>chauffeurs." Shortly after the end of World War II (1945), <BR/>the whole of Volkswagen, factory and patents, was offered <BR/>free to Henry Ford II. He dismissed the Volkswagen Beetle <BR/>as a bad design. <BR/><BR/> *** <BR/><BR/>In 1894, the president of the Royal Society, William Thomson, <BR/>Lord Kelvin, predicted that radio had no future. The first <BR/>radio factory was opened five years later. Today, there are <BR/>more than one billion radio sets in the world, tuned to more <BR/>than 33 000 radio stations around the world. He also <BR/>predicted that heavier-than-air flying machines were <BR/>impossible. The Wright Brother's first flight covered a <BR/>distance equal to only half the length of the wingspan of <BR/>a Boeing 747. <BR/><BR/> *** <BR/><BR/>In 1927, H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, asked, "Who the ____ <BR/>wants to hear actors talk?" In 1936, Radio Times editor Rex <BR/>Lambert thought "Television won't matter in your lifetime <BR/>or mine."Professor Howdyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12189934292678757335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-41869618106335991962008-06-16T08:47:00.000-03:002008-06-16T08:47:00.000-03:00Please note: If you see a UNC student or a liberal...Please note: If you see a UNC student or a liberal reading 'Thought & Humor', please <BR/>explain to them which is thought & which is humor. They always get it backwards.......<BR/>===============<BR/> <BR/>Dog Dictionary<BR/> <BR/>BICYCLES:<BR/>Two-wheeled exercise machines,<BR/>invented for dogs to control body<BR/>fat. To get maximum aerobic<BR/>benefit, you must hide behind a<BR/>bush and dash out, bark loudly<BR/>and run alongside for a few yards;<BR/>the person then swerves and falls<BR/>into the bushes, and you prance away.<BR/> <BR/>=============== <BR/> <BR/><BR/>“Who are You, God?” begets contradictory answers when left to experience <BR/>or perception. Faced with an array of answers, the seeker often turns to <BR/>argument. Are the philosophers able to tell us who God is?<BR/> <BR/>Having read numerous debates, I have noticed the ease with which the<BR/>sophisticated can hide behind a mountain of words and been left doubtful as<BR/>to whether argument, even at its best, is able to untangle the mystery of<BR/>God. While I do not wish to minimize the importance of philosophical<BR/>debate, it seems that many find it easy to climb the ladder of abstraction.<BR/>Yet I wonder: When the discussion rises to such high levels, how many are<BR/>blocked from debate and our existential struggles obscured?<BR/> <BR/>With the limitations of both experience and argument, frustration reaches a<BR/>high point, and all kinds of caricatures of God can be fashioned to suit<BR/>our desires.<BR/> <BR/>Eugene Peterson tells a fascinating story about when he was a pastor in New<BR/>York City. His church’s caretaker, a German man named Willi Ossa, was an<BR/>artist by day and a janitor by night. Ossa offered to do a portrait of<BR/>Peterson, and Peterson agreed, only to keep the friendship going, for Ossa<BR/>harbored a quiet but hostile attitude toward Christianity. Day after day,<BR/>Ossa would paint his subject, yet never permitting him to see how he was<BR/>progressing.<BR/> <BR/>One day, the artist’s wife dropped in and with one look at the picture she<BR/>shrieked, “Sick! You paint him to look like a corpse!” Ossa, upset by this<BR/>untimely revelation, snapped back, “He’s not sick; that is the way he will<BR/>look when the compassion is gone, when the mercy gets squeezed out of him.”<BR/>You see, Ossa hated the state church of his homeland, blaming it for not<BR/>doing more to stop the Holocaust. He wanted to show Peterson his future if<BR/>he persisted in what he perceived to be the “Christian way.” It is a sad<BR/>story and an indictment against Christendom’s historic baggage.<BR/> <BR/>But behind it all, one wonders if that is not the picture of God that many<BR/>have, perhaps even you, my friend. Born out of some aberrant experience or<BR/>radical philosophy, one is left with a portrait of an unloving and uncaring<BR/>God, conditioned by the artist’s own misperceptions. Once again, a point of<BR/>reference is needed in order to answer the question: “Who are you, God?” <BR/>Ravi Zacharias<BR/> <BR/>===============<BR/> <BR/>A UNC student was terribly overweight, so her<BR/>doctor put her on a diet.<BR/> <BR/>"I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day,<BR/>and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see<BR/>you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."<BR/> <BR/>When the student returned, she shocked the doctor by losing<BR/>nearly 20 pounds.<BR/> <BR/>"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said,<BR/>"Did you follow my instructions?"<BR/> <BR/>The girl nodded. "I'll tell you though, I thought I was<BR/>going to drop dead that third day."<BR/> <BR/>"From hunger, you mean?"<BR/> <BR/>"No, from skipping on the third day."Professor Howdyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12189934292678757335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-437964542052755799.post-80825193727214247482008-06-16T08:46:00.000-03:002008-06-16T08:46:00.000-03:00Q: How much does a grand piano cost?A: $1000.00. =...Q: How much does a grand piano cost?<BR/>A: $1000.00.<BR/> <BR/>===============<BR/><BR/>*The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who<BR/>can understand it? "I the Lord search the heart and examine<BR/>the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according<BR/>to what his deeds deserve." --Jeremiah 17Professor Howdyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12189934292678757335noreply@blogger.com